Friendships

This topic has been on my mind for the last week or so and every time I go to write it, I can't think of what to say. So I'm not sure how this is going to turn out. When I think of my friends, I don't know what to think at times. I've had some really close friends and people who I thought were my friends but really weren't. In life we have lots of people who we think are our friends, but in all reality they aren't. I'll talk about that first.

How often are we asked by a friend to help them with something and we do it? But when it seems like we need them, they aren't their for us. Is that a true friend? How long before we see that they are just using us for their own personal gain? It's hard to realize that when it happens, but if we don't then we will always be used by other people. They may not even be our friends but just people that are people that we know. Different things will arise that these people need you for something, it could be as simple as asking for a ride to the store or something. But when it's you that needs help, they aren't there for you. It hurts and makes you mad.

It's worse when it's someone that we really consider a close friend. I can say that those have been the worse times in my life for me. I've had to walk away from some people who I really thought were my friends because I was tired of being used by them. Sure they may try to help you but most of the time they do the least that they can do to help you out. And that's the worse because you put forth effort to do it. Sometimes all they will say is I will pray for you. Yes that's good, but sometimes you need someone to just listen to you. I know that was how it was for me a lot of times, I just wanted someone to talk too. Or to give me a hug and say it's going to be okay. But that doesn't seem to happen these days. Everyone is so wrapped up in themselves that they forget about other people.

Part of me has been hurting lately because I really don't have any friends close to me. All my friends live out of town or out of state. I don't get to talk to them as much as I would like too because we can't ever seem to find time to talk. At times, I give up trying to find a way to make contact with them because I don't want to be disappointed when they don't answer or won't text or call back. I know they have lives, I understand that. I just wish at times, that they could make time to talk to me. Yes I have my boyfriend to talk to, who is my best friend but I still need that female compainship. I miss my friends that live here in Louisiana with me that live in different cities; I just wish for one day with them soon. Who knows when that will happen?

It seems like I can't make friends here where I live because I don't know how to meet people. Yes I go to church, but it's such a huge church and not sure how exactly to go about getting involved when we only have one car and the kids. I want Christian friends in my life because I need people who are going to encourage me and pray with me when I am down. I'm making some wonderful Christian friends through penpalling which is great. But they also live in different states, it's not like I can pick up the phone and ask to come over for a quick visit.

When I moved up here, I let myself get overtaken by work instead of separtaing my personal life from work. It was the wrong choice to make. Maybe if I hadn't made that mistake, I might have some friends up here. The only ones I know are the people I worked with and they are some great people. But now that I don't work and they still do, it's hard to find time to see them. I know that things are going to start looking up soon. I'm just tired of feeling this way.

I know that I have one friend that I can count on at all times. And to me that is the most wonderful feeling in the world. He is always waiting to take me into his arms when I am feeling down. Without him, I don't know where I would be at today. I don't even want to think about it. He will always be my best friend, the one that will no judge me no matter what happens in my life. Thank you Jesus! Yes, Jesus Christ is my best friend. He will always be there for me and will never be too busy to handle my problems no matter how big or small they are.

Thank you to my true friends. It really means the world to me, that I have people who love me and will be there when I need someone to talk to. I love each and every one of you! Be Blessed!